MTC letter No.4

Hola

Yet another week down!

This week was once again full of lessons and Spanish and devotionals etc.
We're currently working on getting the second lesson down... but it's really hard for some reason. Like it just doesn't flow in my head for some reason like the first lesson does. I'm trying to get it so it does, however.
Here, we teach lessons to other missionaries or teachers or volunteers who role-play. It's most effective when they role-play someone they know really well so that it's more accurate. One of the people we teach is a less-active (inactive, actually) named Alex. His dad is LDS and when Alex was a kid his dad severely abused him, his brother and his mother--almost killed them at times, in fact. Alex HATES his father and has based his life around being nothing like his father. His dad is now back into full fellowship in the church, but Alex says he never received an apology. So the big issue with Alex is that he simply does not believe that he can be healed the way we promise him he can. He can't join a church that requires him to forgive his father. And he doesn't deny that Jesus Christ suffered for him, but that He knew that Alex wouldn't really ever come back so.... yeah I don't know. It's confusing.
So for some reason I am soooo emotionally invested whenever we teach Alex. Like we teach a LOT of other people with problems of their own, but for some reason when we teach Alex, teaching about the Atonement of Jesus Christ becomes so much more real to me. Since the subject of forgiving his father is so huge and sensitive, we usually try to avoid attacking it directly and instead focus on other aspects of the Gospel that will help Alex in time forgive his father. We know it won't come immediately--or anywhere close to immediately. But since it's such a huge part of him, we can't help but come around to it during the lessons, which then inevitably leads to testifying of the power of the Atonement. The first time we taught Alex was the first time I teared up while looking into his eyes and testifying to him that the Savior literally has the ability and willingness to take away his burden. I am very sincere in lessons, but I rarely cry. The only other time I have was once again, in a lesson with Alex. This one was yesterday. It was incredible. It was an hour long (double the usual) and the entire time I just tried to listen to the Holy Ghost tell me what the real problem was within him, what I could address to nip it in the bud to be able to better help him know how to come unto Christ with real intent, believing that he could be healed by Him. I teared up sharing with him my own experiences with the Atonement and pleading with him to believe that he could have the same joy that I had experienced when my burden had been lifted. It's amazing what comes out in lessons when the Spirit of the Lord is very present. People share very, very intimate experiences--not necessarily in great detail, but intimate experiences nonetheless with the people who're being taught, the "members" in the lessons included.
When people have sincere questions about the Gospel, I can't wait to answer them to the best of my knowledge. The Gospel just makes SOO much sense to me. Most of the time I half to pick through the doctrine to make sense of it and to walk away with the logic of it all, but when I do it's so good. Like My companions and I were discussing the story of Adam and Eve the other day and I didn't understand some things, but after a couple minutes I felt like I had made sense of the initially illogical parts. Not the I have the whole thing figured out by ANY means....


Love,
Em