Okay now this is a frustration post, so feel free to navigate away from my blog now.
WHAT IN THE WORLD ARE 19-YEAR-OLD GIRLS THINKING THESE DAYS??????? THEY ARE GETTING MARRIED FREAKING LEFT AND EVER-LOVIN' RIGHT! -AND AFTER KNOWING THE GUY A RIDICULOUSLY SHORT AMOUNT OF TIME!!!! WITH AN EVEN SHORTER ENGAGEMENT!!!!
AND DON'T EVEN GET ME STARTED ABOUT THEIR HAVING BABIES!! YOU CAN BARELY TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF WITHOUT PARENTAL SUPERVISION, WHAT IN THE ROYAL WORLD MAKES YOU THINK YOU CAN RAISE SOMETHING ANY MORE COMPLEX THAN A PLANT!?!?!?!?
GET TO KNOW THE MAN BEFORE YOU MARRY YOURSELF OFF. HECK, GET TO KNOW YOURSELF!
ALL 19-YEAR-OLD WOMEN WHO THINK THEY ARE READY FOR MARRIAGE, STOP.
Sa-LOW down. Take a breather.
We know you two are 'in love' but try, try and be semi rational. Realize your own limitations, your own lack of life experience, your own utter ignorance and naivety and remind yourself that IT NEVER HURTS TO WAIT A LITTLE WHILE TIL YOU ACTUALLY KNOW WHAT YOU'RE GETTING INTO!!!
It's not just "Oh yay, I get to choose the menu and dress the guy and live with and sleep with him and blah blah blah blah blah.
IT'S SO MUCH MORE THAN THAT AND YOU'LL LAND FLAT BACK ON YOUR PARENTS' DOORSTEP WONDERING WHERE YOU WENT WRONG IF YOU GIVE NO THOUGHT FOR A FEW LOGISTICS AND PRACTICAL REALITIES!
The guy may very well be the-best-thing-that-has-ever-happened-to-you as well as be older, but the VAST majority of men are still not smart enough to actually stop the marriage from happening prematurely. They compartmentalize everything and right now the only drawer that's pulled out is the one that contains the I-want-you-I-need-you-oh-baby-oh-baby file. The drawer containing the you're-too-young-and-just-shouldn't-be-doing-this-yet file was unfortunately thrown out when you graduated high school, and they just don't think about that--the file is gone!
All they see is the fact that you want to be with them as much as they want to be with you. Which is a lovely thought, is it not? Too bad that mentality is hopelessly flawed, eh? since marriage is a million times BIGGER and harder than that.
You have to do it for yourself. You actually have to think when the rest of your LIFE is on the line. You have to think about what is BEST for you at this stage in your life, not just what feels good at this stage in your life, or this month, or this minute.
The 'when' plays a very large role in the 'why', and is just as important as the 'who'.
4 comments:
Wow. I'm not worried about you getting married, am I?
You must have a friend getting married. It's only just begun my dear.
OK Em, now please fill us in on WHAT spurred this post! I am really curious!
P.S. I do hope in my little heart that this was not aimed at myself....though come to think of it, I wasn't 19 when I got married. I was 21....
100% don't agree. Sorry, girl.
61 years of love, and growth for my parents - both 18 when married. Maturity was a major part of it - dad was sent off to war. They had the tough times - but if believing that it's all good all the time - it's probably not something for you. So if you find the person, you should wait until you feel you're 'old enough' or 'lived enough' before you marry him? Lucky next girl in line! I love posts like this - stirs the blood a bit - exposes a bit of all of us. Makes us think. True love is not why, or when, it's earned in the happy times and in the battles of life. Lucky me to see my parents still melt when they see each other across the room. No age defines the right time - the heart and soul does.
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